It is frequently assumed that when a man takes a woman out on a date, he is the applicant and she is the interviewer. But men would be wise to do their own interviewing when first meeting a woman.
Unfortunately, we are at a stanch disadvantage. Why? If the woman is beautiful and extremely attractive, that seems to make up for boring conversation, airhead moments and rude, unpolished behavior. Our minds frequently go to that, “I can’t wait to have sex with her” mode. Sex before marriage is riddled with issues.
We spend most of the night trying not to undress her with our eyes. This is a huge problem for a lot of reasons. First, the prettiest girls aren’t typically the best in bed (new blog coming). Second, like with every goal for a man, once you’ve conquered it, you’re looking for the next.
I know…it sounds bad, right? But here at The Love Script, we keep real and are going to help you know what you don’t know. And men, you know this is true for the most part.
Below is a checklist of twelve things to evaluate your new lady friend. Some of these cross over from the “Did He Make The Cut” list, others are unique to our ladies. If you answer “yes” to more than 7 of the questions, I strongly suggest evaluating further or running for the hills.
1) Was she late? YES NO
A woman that doesn’t respect your time isn’t worth your time.
2) Did she treat you like a convict? YES NO
Women certainly have many reasons to be apprehensive, but so do men. If a woman agrees to go on a date with you and you haven’t done anything to make her uncomfortable, she should treat you like the proper gentleman caller that you are. To be treated like there are horns protruding from your forehead and tail between your legs, is uncalled for, unless it is…called for.
3) Did she lack engaging conversation? YES NO
Don’t you hate it when you’re sitting across from a woman who A) talks in seven thousand word sentences and so fast that you can’t keep up with the ninja-like jump from subject to subject or B) says no more than two words in response to every gut-wrenching effort you make to defibrillate life into the dead evening.
4) Online Special: Did she look drastically different from her picture? YES NO
Ah yes, the old switcheroo. There is nothing worst then buying a Bentley and leaving with an Oldsmobile; shame on her.
5) Did she introduce new information that should have come out earlier? YES NO
Dishonesty at the birth of a relationship can set the stage for trouble. Although, some may lean toward being careful with personal information, a lie is a lie is a lie. Telling someone you’re single but not sharing that you have kids is just wrong. Dishonesty is not just about telling the opposite of the truth, it’s also the avoidance of truth.
6) Did she over order? YES NO
One of my personal pet peeves. A woman who will order the most expensive thing on the menu on a first date says a lot with that action. It’s just tacky. And no, it doesn’t make a man cheap. I’ve experienced a woman ordering 6 different entrees, tasting all of them and then asking the waiter to throw out the leftovers.
7) Did she booze it up? YES NO
This goes along with the previous question. Full disclosure, I am not a drinker. But even if you are, a woman ordering six or seven drinks on a first date sends a flaming red warning sign. The sheer lack of responsibility alone is scary. FACT: Alcohol decreases your decision-making ability. Why would you do this on a first date?
8) Did she set a thirst trap? YES NO
A woman who intentional tries to draw on your lust is saying what? She wants to sleep with you? Probably not, she just wants you to want to sleep with her. A first date should be full of romance, discovery and possibilities. If they are playing games in the beginning they’ll be playing at the end.
9) Was she on her phone? YES NO
If she does have to take a peek, she should excuse herself or explain why she needs to look. But a woman sitting across from you in her phone all night is certainly not giving you the attention you deserve. It’s just tasteless.
10) Did she thank you for the evening? YES NO
I know we live in a society where we’ve become devoid of manners and decorum, which makes it all the more special when a woman goes the extra mile (sad) to just say “thank you”. A woman that has the expectation of you taking her out, paying for the evening and showing no gratitude has some character flaws that could be more serious than this.
My Advice?
Be vigilant. She said yes and went out with you. Now it’s time to see if it was worth your time. Remember, you’re just as much a prize as she is.
PDH - Paul D. Hannah
Author
Paul D. Hannah is an award-winning writer, producer, director and author. He has counseled and help hundreds of couples and spoken nationally to thousands about the power of love and relationships. He has a passion for marriages and helping people achieve their love goals.
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